I will now embark on a case of stupidity that far exceeds normal human behaviors. Today I will share my studies on the Common Midwestern Redneck. This is a type of human that is most illogical and for the most time suffering from a severe lack of intelligence and common sense. This particular event happened to take place in Wisconsin. It involves the Common Midwestern Redneck, drinking, guns and a lawn mower.
Kieth Walendowski, a 56 year old Common Midwestern Redneck was arrested after shooting his lawn mower with a shotgun. This poor fellow showed a complete lack of common sense and intelligence, which is common with this particular species. It appears Walendowski was attempting to start the lawnmower because he said it wouldn't start when questioned by authorities as to why he did it. This poor, simple, silly little man who hasn't the brains God gave the flies I'm so fond of eating, may spend up to six years in prison and pay $11,000 fine for getting drunk and destroying his own property. Oh well, the Common Midwestern Rednecks never learn.